Focus on the Future and Weigh the Consequences of your Reactions
Ndereya had the tendency to settle scores with the offender ‘that very minute’; threatening to burst if he did not do so. He cared less about the consequences of his revenge; hoping to get satisfaction from paying back the offender immediately; and in the offender’s own currency. Although this would provide momentous relief, the fruits of the reaction were temporary since his actions had been propelled more by emotions rather than reason; and therefore, were often irrational. So, when his schemes back-fired, his offenders would have the last laugh.
Furaha suffered from a weakness that was somewhat similar to Ndereya’s. She had a group of so-called friends whose favourite pass-time was ‘malicious talk’. One night, she learnt that they had been gossiping about how stupid she was for having fallen pregnant at the age of forty-five. She was very mad; calling each of them that very night, and warning them to leave her alone. Furaha’s problem was that she did not know the wisdom of ‘sleeping over issues’. Should she have waited till morning, she would have probably realised that her threats would never muzzle her friends’ mouths even if she wanted to; and that rather, she would have been better off employing other ways to tackle the issue.
Unlike Ndereya or Furaha, learn to switch on your self-control when offended; and to restrain yourself from acting impulsively. It pays to focus on the bottom line. Where will your reactions lead you to, in the long run; when ‘all is said and done’? When you are upset, maintain a sober frame of mind. Guard yourself from ‘bursting’, as you may spend your life regretting why you reacted that way. Before you respond to an offence, consider the consequences of your reactions in the short, medium and long run; since some repercussions may be distasteful, harmful and permanent. Do not be short-sighted. Remember that over-reacting reveals who you really are on the inside; and may instantly destroy your image and the relationships that took you so long to build. Learn to sleep over issues. That way, you are likely to think clearer the following day.